16th September

Completed morning program. Visited Escorts hospital for Venita's tests as desired by Dr. AK Agarwal. The cost of one test, namely 1,25 Dihydroxy Vitamin D is Rs.1990/- besides there are some other tests. The report of Sugar level is not at all satisfactory and will call for a review of medicines for Sugar control. Hemoglobin level is almost normal as it is 11.2. It should be min. 12. I have to show it to Dr. AK Agarwal on 18th, when I meet him along with Venita. Retired to sleep at 11.15 pm.

14th & 15th September

On 14th tried to contact Dr. Sunil Kumar, M.S.M. Cb.(Urology),Senior Surgeon, Safdarjang hospital. But could not contact him. He had prescribed Urimax-D tablets for reduction of the size of prostate gland in 2004, when its size was 31.2cc. It reduced to 22.7cc in 2007 & increased to 28cc in 2008. Pre void residual urine was insignificant in 2004. It became 16cc in 2007 and 9cc in 2008. I had showed the reports to Dr.Sunil kumar on 21/07/09. After seeing the 3 reports each of 2004,2007 & 2008, he advised I should stop taking Urimax-D tablets and desired to review after 6 months. I have got the PSA test done and it is 0.64 as against the range of 0.0-4.4. I have not been able to contact him. Some persons in the Safdarjang hospital told that he was transferred to RML hospital. He could not be traced there also. I have requested some persons to find out if he has resigned and opened his own clinic. I will try for another few days. If he cannot be located I will show the reports to another Urologist. At present I have no problem due to slightly enlarged prostrate and the PSA is well within the normal range.
On 15th attended a birthday party of my grand son at Gurgaon. His maternal Grand-Father, Grand-Mother & Mousi had come from Jaipur and Mumbai, respectively to wish him Happy birthday. The flat was decorated with colorful balloons, multicolor stars & stencils. Babua, my grand son had invited his class mates. They played in the play well corner of the Mc. Donald's followed by a get together with their mothers in the restaurant. In all his 10 friends came with beautiful gifts. There were return gifts to them and all of them were putting on colorful caps and clothes. Babua was quite excited,so were we. Today he is 4. We left for Vikaspuri at about 8.30 pm.
In the morning during Vipassana I had prayed for his long life, health and bright future. So also I prayed for all the children. My second son, Siddharth Shrivastava (Silku), based in Gurgaon, could not come with his family as he was preoccupied in some urgent work. His wife was blessed with another daughter about a month back. He said he would join in the party on 25th, when Parikshit Shrivastava (Bablu), my 3rd son returns from Finland. I told my daughter-in-law that I would pay for the party. The in laws of Bablu are staying back for the party till 26th September. But their daughter Shivani, Babua's Mausi, is leaving for Mumbai on Sunday, the 19th. Babua wanted us to stay back at Gurgaon for the night. We persuaded him to allow us to go back to Vikaspuri with a promise that we will stay back next time when we come to Gurgaon. Retired to sleep at 11pm.

13th September

On 13th obtained approval for the treatment of Venita from CGHS, Pandara road. Completed my last Will and Wish. I have to send a copy of the Will to Vikas whom I have appointed as executor of the Will. My friend of 50 year vintage about whom I wrote in my blog earlier again met me to tell about his failed married life. He asked me as to why his wife had not poisoned him if she wanted to get rid of as she disliked him.I told him to get over these negative feelings about his wife. No wife poisons her husband unless she has a paramour to take care of her. My friend said that his wife had also an affair but the person ditched her and married another person. I told him that it established what I told him that she had none to take care of her as her lover left her & perhaps was not serious of the affair. I further told him that you were now married over 50 years, forget the past, take care of her and live happily for whatever years remain for both of you. My friend did not feel convinced and went away without telling anything. After his departure, I felt I could not convince him of my advice. His is a very sad case. I don't think he will come to me ever.
Retired to sleep at 11pm.

10th to 12th Septemeber

Completed the morning program. Visited Safdarjang hospital and collected endorsement for eye treatment of Venita. She is under treatment of Dr. Dinesh Talwar of Center for Sight, Safdarjang Enclave, New Delhi, a CGHS approved center. She has been under his treatment for now about 2 years. Her right eye is the subject of treatment. She had 2 laser corrections. But after each there is again a relapse. Now a 3rd avastin injection will be given in the right eye. It is a painful procedure. But now she bears it. We have to keep on trying so that she does not become blind in the right eye. It is a diabetic effect. Now her diabetes is under control after we started treatment of Dr. Anoop Misra of Fortis hospital. He is quite expensive and not approved by CGHS. So we have to bear the expenses. It does not matter as long as she is showing signs of improvement. Attended 2nd Friday lunch of the month of September at CIOS mess. Just a few officers of the IAS and other services came. Madan Bezbaruah, close to me, came. Prior to lunch we had a get together of IPS officers of the batch, available at Delhi. In all 9 IPS officers attended. Three could not.We have been together for the last 46 years and from our prime youth to 70 years. It has been a long journey full of sweet and sad memories. Quite a few have left us for their heavenly abode and our journey is also likely to end later or sooner. Let us continue to spend as much as we can and help each other in developing mentally and spiritually. Because of 9 IPS officers the number of the batch mates, attending lunch, went up to about 16. At least 15 is the norm. Otherwise we have to pay a lump sum for the lunch. If 15 people are there then each one of us has to pay Rs.300/-. If the number is less we have a contributory deposit from which the balance is paid. More important is meeting and renewing an association which is as big as 46 years now. Next get together is proposed in November where the spouses will also be invited. I have been told to get BSF mess, Nizamuddin, for the get together. I have told them to give the firm dates for booking the mess.Curiously the initiative for the get together with spouses is being taken by our batch mates who have lost their spouses. I think by seeing us with our spouses they will get a vicarious satisfaction. After all we have been together for 46 years. So an affinity has developed which is human and does not need any elaboration.
On 12th it was Hrishi Panchami, when all the Sapt Hrishi's are invoked and offerings & prayers made for well being. Venita participated in the puja, which continued for over 2 hours when she had to sit on the ground. Later she complained of back pain and said she won't be able to go to Escorts hospital for tests as proposed. Retired to sleep at 11.15 pm.

9th September

Visited Safdarjang hospital. A pair of crutches was given to a disabled young man by me on request of an officer of rehabilitation department of Safdarjang hospital.A photograph was taken of me and others. It was not prearranged. Now a news item will be given. I think it is not necessary. I could not refuse it as I am under treatment there. We should believe in doing more than in publicity. All should be done in a spirit of service, which is not visible so much these days in the society. Everyone wants publicity only for anything that is done by them, may be, in discharge of their bounden duty.Revised the 'Will'. After showing it to Venita I will finalize it. Retired to sleep at 11pm.

8th September

On 8th Venita had OCT (Angiography of eyes). Her right eye which has been twice laser operated has again shown signs of relapse. Now she will have to take another Avastine injection for corrective action. Sent an email to DG Health Services, Govt. of India, reporting denial of permission for eye examination in a CGHS approved center on recommendation by a Govt. consultant. Had cup of coffee in Mc.Donald's, Khan Market along with Venita. Retired to sleep at 11pm.

7th September

On 7th an old friend of mine met me and narrated sad story of his family life. His was an arranged marriage about 50 years back. They are to celebrate golden Anniversary shortly. But I did not see any enthusiasm in him. He said that his wife disliked him right from the 1st day of the marriage & still continued to dislike him. I asked him what the reason could be. He wanted to tell something but restrained from telling. He further said that his wife tried in every possible way to leave him, but he had stuck onto her thinking that marriage was sacrament and could not be done away with. He was quite a sad man. He further said that she wanted him to leave her and go. But he told her where he could go. He could not commit suicide as that was against the law of nature. So life is going on for him, not so much of concern for him as for her whose wish to live without him is not getting fulfilled. I said that you have lived together so long, why not carry on for some more time. He agreed telling that there was no alternative.
Retired to sleep at 11pm.

3rd to 6th September

On 3rd could complete my morning program. However pranayam time had to be reduced drastically in order to complete all other exercises, asans, 40 minute walk to get ready by 10am to go to the court/chamber. Tried to contact CGHS officers to inquire about my complaint no. C-54978, in connection with refusal by CMO, Pandara road, CGHS for eye examination in a CGHS approved center. Dr.Mukesh Verma, with whom I exchange emails regularly on various issues, advised me to approach CPIO CGHS for action taken by them. I will take follow-up action in consultation with him. There is no DG CGHS, there is only one DG health services and he looks after the CGHS also. There is one ADG CGHS who at present is Dr. Dinesh Bhatnagar. His telephone number is 23061467. The Director CGHS is Dr. Parekh and his number is 23062800. The immediate superior to the CMO Pandara road is Addl. Director CGHS. His telephone number is 23515934. At present Dr.Tejan is holding the post. Despite my repeated efforts to talk to them, I could not get any one on the line. Either they are busy in meetings, having lunch or not available. I will pursue to contact them as there is no other alternative.On 4th we had rotational lunch in the house of Sh.Caire in flat no.259 along with Sarvashri SK Dutta & RC Jha & families. Neha had come with Babua. I told Babua the story of vikings. He liked it. Mr. Dutta & Mr. Caire said that they could not open attachments to my mails. I don't have their phone numbers. Jaymith should talk to them when I have their numbers.On 5th it was drizzling in the morning but I had my walk for 45 mins. Vikas rang up for lunch on Saturday or Sunday. As I was having lunch with some persons in the society could not go with him. Did not attend the executive committee meeting of the society of which I am a member. There is no pleasure in it. I go there when they insist for my presence for supporting an issue in which I have concurrent view. The DYSP(Retired) Sh.Kaushik, gave me a loud salutation when I was walking in the park. I am sure there is something behind this salutation. Let us see. Paid Rs.200 to the security officer Chopra for tea to guards. I pay this amount every month. In a discourse of Brahmakumaris, it was suggested that we should be creative in our dealings with relationships. That will be possible provided we have love, compassion and good will for all. On 6th I realized that I should increase the time of pranayam. In particular anulom vilom is quite useful. Retired to sleep at 10.45pm.

1st & 2nd September

On 1st collected Stevi O Cal two jars full of powder. I find it will be convenient to use Stevi powder.The Stevi O Cal in pouches gets solidified and sometimes does not dilute when used. It is said to be a food supplement. I think I can also use it. Told Venita to use it in all her recipes as a substitute to sugar. Visited SBI for work. Could not contact Additional Director, Central zone, CGHS for direction to CMO, CGHS, Pandara Road to permit me to undertake eye examination in a CGHS approved center. Could not sleep after 0130 hours of 2nd September. I will try to make it up later during the day. Did pending tits-bits and Vipassana. Recited Gayatri Mantra for quite sometime when I could not sleep during the early hours of 2nd Sep. Janmastami was celebrated on 2nd. It was celebrated yesterday at Vrindaban, it being a Wednesday with Rohini Nakshatra. The Nakshatra continued today also till 10 am. It was celebrated in Mathura today. I joined in the celebrations in the temple within the premises of the society at midnight. About 100 people including children attended and chanted the name of Krishna. Spiritually the birth of Krishna at midnight signifies the end of night of sorrow and beginning of morning of light and happiness. Images of the celebrations were shown live in various tv channels. I sent good wishes on the day to about 20 persons. Only 5 of them responded. Retired to sleep at 0045 hours of 3rd September.

25th to 31st August

On 25th visited Safdarjang hospital for endorsement of refraction test in the Center for Sight. Visited CGHS and collected medicines. Amitabh Thakur, SP,CBI, came. Later met him in the Special unit/CBI, where I had gone to meet the DIG. The DIG was out to Ghaziabad for delivering lecture. This is a unit of CBI where I worked from 1985-1989. I visit it at least once in a year as a matter of good will gesture. In the Special unit met Sh.Kashyap, who received President's Medal for Distinguished Services. He was DYSP when I was DIG. Met Sh.Bhanu also who is SPI.
On 26th we were to have a quiet lunch at a restaurant selected by Neha. But could not go there as Babua was not well. Instead of going to the chambers I decided to go to Gurgaon to spend time with him. We returned after Bablu came back from office. At the end of 71 years I feel no problems in my health and I am still working 15/16 hours everyday. I hope to meet a healthy end. On 27th Subhash noted that his email id is hacked. Today is the birthday of Silku. Wished him long life. Relationship develops in the mind. It is oneness with the soul/energy of the other. Attended IPS dinner at the BSF mess Nizamuddin. Met the daughter of my close friend's elder sister who is now married to Sh.SC Sinha,DG,NIA. It was a grand get together. We could meet our old friends. On 28th visited CGHS, Pandara road. The CMO did not give permission for the refraction test in the Center for Sight. I will have to report it to CGHS headquarters. On 29th Sunita & Subhash came for lunch. They brought a gift for me. On 30th visited Neha and thereafter Silku at Gurgaon to look up the grand daughter born on 19th August at 11am. It is the 12th day of her life. Gave a 10gm gold coin to her as we have done to each of our grand children in the past. On 31st visited SBI Vikaspuri, PNB Vikaspuri & SBI PBB parliament street for work. Lodged a complaint to the Additional Director and CGHS helpline regarding refusal to give permission by CMO Pandara park, CGHS. The following line of Albert Einstein struck my attention:
"The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results".
Retired to sleep at 11pm.